Sepia - A Homeopathic Remedy for Mothers

Motherhood: at it's best, it can fill our days with joy, sweetness, and contentment. Yet, on the worst days, being a mother can be one of the hardest challenges of life. The ups-and-downs of pregnancy, the constant demands of children, the feeling that we will never be able to have a single moment to ourselves; these feelings seem to just come with the territory of being a mother. But is there a better way?

There is one well-known homeopathic remedy that is of immense help to mothers. It can help those bad days feel less dire and dramatic, and make them happen less often. Homeopathic Sepia to the rescue!

What is Sepia?

photo from sci-news.com

Although the word Sepia is commonly used to describe the reddish-brown tone of old photographs, the origin of this word is actually the Latin word for cuttlefish. Cuttlefish ink is a rich brown color, and it was used as an ink or drawing medium for thousands of years. Homeopathic Sepia officinalis is a remedy made from the ink of the cuttlefish.

Never-Well-Since...

While homeopathic treatment of chronic conditions is typically not do-it-yourself, there are certain chronic ailments that are somewhat easier to treat. These are ailments where there was an obvious trigger, known as a Never-Well-Since event or exposure. For instance, chronic ailments following head injuries are often successfully treated with Natrum sulph or Arnica, and ailments following a broken heart are often successfully treated with Ignatia or Natrum mur.

Homeopathic Sepia is listed as a top remedy for the following Never-Well-Since events/exposures [1 - Hahnemann Revisited: A Textbook of Classical Homeopathy for the Professional]:

• Childbirth
• Nursing
• Postpartum depression
• Hormonal treatment
• Birth control pill
• Hysterectomy
• Puberty
• Menopause

Clearly, Sepia's healing action has a particular focus on hormonal-induced states in women. While it is not a cure-all for each-and-every mother, nonetheless a large proportion of mothers can benefit from Sepia.

Characteristic Mental/Emotional Indications for Sepia

As with all homeopathic remedies, Sepia will work best when it matches well with the mental, emotional, and physical symptoms that a person is exhibiting. The mental/emotional picture for Sepia is one of this remedy's most striking features.

The classic picture of a Sepia woman includes:

• mothers who feel overworked and/or overwhelmed,
• irritability or anger specifically triggered by one's children and/or spouse,
• feeling less affectionate or apathetic towards one's children and/or spouse, 
• a desire to escape, even for just a few minutes of solitude, 
• "loves her husband and children dearly but is too exhausted to feel anything but the need to get through the day's work and survive to the next," [2] and/or
• feeling "overly conscientious about family responsibilities and thus excessively guilty about any desire or effort to avoid them" [3].

Women often assume that these feelings are just a natural part of motherhood. They may feel guilty about having these feelings or try to deny that they exist. Nonetheless, Sepia can help the body and mind become more balanced so that these feelings occur less often and with less intensity.

Additional Indications for Sepia

Some additional indications for Sepia include:

• reduced or absent desire for sex,
• feeling better from physical activity and/or dancing,
• postpartum depression and/or irritability,
• urinary problems after pregnancy,
• weeping while relating her symptoms,
• premenstrual symptoms including irritability and aversion to sex,
• hot flashes,
• nausea during pregnancy which is worse from fasting and smells or thoughts of foods,
• pregnancy-induced varicose veins, hemorrhoids, and/or vaginitis, and
• a wide range of other symptoms including allergies, headaches, insomnia, backaches, and literally hundreds of other conditions.

Although Sepia's overall sphere of action includes a wide variety of symptoms, that does not mean it is "the" remedy for all of those conditions. There are over a thousand different homeopathic remedies, and common symptoms such as headaches are associated with hundreds of different remedies.  For instance, in my homeopathic software, 845 remedies are listed under "constipation" and 1,249 remedies are listed for "headache".

What makes homeopathic remedies so effective is that they are selected specifically for each individual. No homeopath would recommend Sepia for every person who has a headache. However, if the person is a mother who is exhibiting some of Sepia's characteristic mental/emotional indications (described above), then Sepia is likely to be a good match.

Success With Sepia for Mothers

In my own life, I have found Sepia to be tremendously useful in helping to balance my emotions and leave me feeling contented with motherhood:

• During my second pregnancy, I developed irritability and anger that I had never experienced before. By the time I found homeopathy nearly three years later, I was often blowing up at my children and felt quite overwhelmed and exhausted. Some days, when my husband would return home from work, I had reached the point where I felt like running away, and I would have to go for a solitary walk just to escape for a short time. I felt guilty for having these feelings, and didn't want to admit them even to myself. Sepia, along with a few other well-chosen chronic remedies, has made a huge difference. I now rarely feel irritable, and I never feel irritability or anger to anywhere near the same magnitude as I used to. I no longer experience that desire to run away, and I no longer feel overwhelmed by the demands of motherhood and homemaking.

Some examples of treatment with Sepia from the homeopathic literature include the following:

• "A 35-year-old woman became pregnant again soon after weaning her second child, then 22 months old. By six weeks she was exhausted and nauseous before mealtimes and would have to eat a little something to relieve it, but the smell of roast chicken and other favorite foods made her feel even sicker and forced her to lie down to try to sleep. Also sensitive to odors like soap and perfume, she felt better when she remembered to exercise, although at their worst her symptoms immobilized her and made her crabby and apathetic. Sepia 30 soon wrought an amazing change in her: within two weeks she had regained her strength and appetite, feeling only minor nausea occasionally from strong perfume. She remained in good health and went on to give birth at home without any difficulty." [3 - Homeopathic Medicines for Pregnancy and Childbirth]
• "A woman of 26 consulted me for irregular periods, the interval averaging 35 to 40 days, often with brownish staining around the midcycle. After a home birth three years ago she had nursed the child for a year, with hemorrhoids and constipation developing and her periods getting off track during that time. Although reluctant to speak about her personal life, she was openly resentful of her husband, who was devoted to the child but highly critical of her and scornful of her opinions, and she could no longer tolerate making love with him. After a round of Sepia... her periods quickly reverted to normal, while her other symptoms improved significantly, and she herself became much more assertive with her husband. No further treatment was needed." [3 - Homeopathic Medicines for Pregnancy and Childbirth]
• "...emotional apathy may develop from some profound sorrow or disappointment in a reserved individual who cannot allow herself to feel because she cannot afford it. A case in point was a 26-year-old woman with amenorrhoea [the absence of menstruation] who, three years earlier, had suffered severely from an unfortunate love... Since that time she had been cold and unresponsive with her family and friends and toward the world in general... She was polite and dutiful, but completely indifferent... Initially there was no dramatic change. Sepia can be a slow starter. Yet on a visit two months later she was a different person - not carefree or even happy, but more caring and responsive, and her menses had resumed. No further remedy was prescribed, since the single dose had obviously reached some deep level of her emotional disharmony and was beginning to heal it. Instead, the remedy was allowed to continue dispelling her 'stilled' or suppressed emotions, as she blossomed into a warm, lovely and now happy human being." [2 - Portraits of Homoeopathic Medicines]

Dosage and Potency Guidance

I generally advise starting with homeopathic Sepia in the 30c potency, although for some people it may be more appropriate to start with a lower or higher potency depending upon their individual sensitivity level. When used very soon after the precipitating event (such as pregnancy or childbirth), it is possible that only one dose is needed for the body to restore balance. When there has been a time lapse between the event and the usage of Sepia, more than one dose may be needed.

If the Sepia state has become part of the chronic symptoms picture (with symptoms lasting more than 6 weeks), a good rule of thumb for simple dosing is to wait-and-watch for several weeks after the first dose to see if the Sepia is making a positive difference. With all homeopathic remedies, the least number of doses is always the best. Homeopathic remedies work by stimulating the body to heal itself. Anytime there is a noticeable improvement, no more doses should be given unless the symptoms start to regress (or unless there is a plateau, where the symptoms get better to a point but then stop improving). And if no improvement is observed within 3 doses of taking a remedy, the remedy should be discontinued.

While Sepia typically works quite well for treating mothers, in cases where the Sepia indications are long-standing it is possible that some other remedies will be needed before Sepia can do its work. For instance, if there have been significant traumas, losses, or drug-exposures in the meantime since the Sepia state was induced, those more-recent events/exposures may need to be treated before Sepia will be able to be effective.  In those instances, consulting with a well-trained homeopath is more likely to lead to long-term success with Sepia.

References

[1] De Schepper, Luc (2001). Hahnemann Revisited: A Textbook of Classical Homeopathy for the Professional. Santa Fe, NM: Full of Life Publications.
[2] Coulter, Catherine R. (1998). Portraits of Homoeopathic Medicines: Psychophysical Analyses of Selected Constitutional Types, Vol. 1. St. Louis, MO: Quality Medical Publishing, Inc.
[3] Moskowitz, Richard M.D. (1992). Homeopathic Medicines for Pregnancy and Childbirth. Berkely, CA: North Atlantic Books.

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor or licensed healthcare professional. I am a homeopathic practitioner whose services are considered complementary and alternative by the state of New Mexico. The uses of homeopathic remedies described herein are provided for educational use only.

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The Desk Cycle - Easy Physical Activity Booster For Desk Workers

The Desk Cycle is a small stationary bike that fits under most desks. It allows a person to easily incorporate physical activity into times that would normally be sedentary, such as reading a book, watching TV, or while working on the computer.  I received a complimentary Desk Cycle and my family has been testing it out for the last few weeks.

The Desk Cycle has turned out to be useful to all four members of our family, so I'm excited to share our experiences with it. In this post I will focus specifically on the use of the Desk Cycle by my husband and myself while working on a computer.

Our Immediate Impressions

The Desk Cycle was well-packed and easy to assemble with the supplied tools. Given that there are so many poorly made products on the market these days, we were surprised by how well-built the desk cycle is. It is sturdy and has rubberized feet that keep it from slipping away while being used, though at higher resistance levels the bike can slide away if it's on a smooth surface. There is a simple solution included with the Desk Cycle, a Velcro strap used to secure the bike to your chair.

The Desk Cycle is amazingly quiet while in-use; we were able to use it unobtrusively while doing a variety of tasks. The Desk Cycle has an attached display unit that shows the speed and distance, along with other information. We have found the display unit to be easily read while the bike is under a desk, however, the display unit can be moved to the desktop using the supplied stand and extension cable.

Fitting the Desk Cycle Under Desks

For reference, we thought it would be useful if we included some measurements of our desks and legs. I am fairly short at 5 feet 1 inch, but my legs are a little long for my height such that petite pants are always too short for me. My inseam (from crotch to floor) is just short of 30 inches. My husband is 5 feet 10.5 inches, and his inseam is 32.5 inches.

At-Home Desk Measurements

• Height to bottom of keyboard tray - 23.75 inches 
• Desk height - 28.75 inches 
• Depth of desk - 23.75 inches without keyboard tray extended; 32 inches with keyboard tray fully extended 
• Seat height - 20 inches 

Husband's Work Desk Measurements

• Height to bottom of keyboard tray - 26 inches (it has a support arm in the middle of the tray that extends downward, but doesn't seem to have any effect on using the Desk Cycle since it is in the middle of the tray) 
• Desk height - 30 inches 
• Depth of desk - > 5 feet since it is a corner desk Seat ht: 18 inches

How Does the Desk Cycle Work?

The Desk Cycle is quite simple to use. It has a knob that allows the user to easily choose among eight resistance levels. The resistance levels are actually achieved through the use of magnets, with Level 1 being fairly easy and Level 8 requiring quite a bit of effort.  The Desk Cycle fits well under most desks but can also be used while sitting on a couch or chair away from a desk.

My Husband's Experience Using the Desk Cycle at Home and Work

My husband has to be a little careful when using the Desk Cycle at our home desk, as he can bump his knees on the keyboard tray while cycling if he's not paying attention. For him, the Desk Cycle actually fits better under his desk at work than under our desk at home. At work, he is able to easily cycle without hitting his knees on his desk due to a combination of a higher keyboard tray and lower seating position.

The desk cycle is so easy to use while working that my husband has had to be careful to not use it too much, at least until his muscles become accustomed to it. He has been easily cycling about 5-8 miles per day at resistance level 2 on the Desk Cycle and is looking forward to going further once he is ready. His knees, which have always been problematic, were initially a bit sore from using the Desk Cycle, but they are getting into the groove of being able to use the Desk Cycle.

We wondered if the Desk Cycle would be a useful tool to help my husband overcome the disadvantages of his desk job. 40+ hours per week of sitting at his desk for over 11 years have given my husband chronically tight, weak lower back and hip muscles. After just a few weeks of using the Desk Cycle, my husband is able to tell that it is having a positive impact; his lower back and hips are more flexible and feel stronger. Though he has a long way to go, the short-term improvement has been surprising. Combining the Desk Cycle with some yoga stretching has even allowed him to begin doing some light strength training, which was previously hindered by his back and hips.

My Experience Using the Desk Cycle at the Computer Desk

I typically exercise 6-7 days per week with yoga, walking, hiking, gardening, and/or strength training. Nonetheless, I do sit at a desk ~15-20 hours per week. Our at-home desk, where I do most of my blogging and homeopathic consulting, works well for me with the Desk Cycle. I can easily cycle without having to rearrange anything.  

Resistance level 2 or 3 works well for me without breaking much of a sweat or messing up my typing abilities. My posture is actually much better while using the Desk Cycle, as I tend to sit up much straighter while cycling instead of slouching on my chair. Typically, if I am sitting for an extended period of time I will have some stiffness when I stand up, but I've noticed that if I cycle while I'm sitting I feel much less stiff when I stand up. 

Overall Impressions

Overall, my husband and I are very pleased with the Desk Cycle. It is a fabulous tool for helping us increase our physical activity levels and improve our physical health while at a desk. Although my husband and I have substantially different levels of physical health, the Desk Cycle has proven to be effective and enjoyable for both of us. In fact, the only real disadvantage is that testing out the Desk Cycle has made me want to have another one, so that one can remain at my husband's workplace and one can be used at home.

Affiliate Disclosure - Links to Amazon are affiliate links. If you use these links, your price remains the same, but I earn a small commission. Thanks for supporting this site!

Our Daily Homeschool and Housework Routine

Having routines for homeschooling and housework helps our lives run more smoothly.  Sure, there are weeks when the routine gets thrown completely out the window, but most of our weekdays follow a routine which is fairly predictable.  Using a routine helps ensure that my kids have minimal resistance to doing housework, because they know what to expect and what is expected of them daily.  Our routine also makes our exploration of academics more effective: because my children know that I am only available for academic pursuits for a set time each day, they are motivated for us to do as much as we can while I am available before I start my work hours.

It's been several years since I blogged about our homeschool routine, so I thought I'd post an update about what our days are looking like now. My kids are now 6 and 9, and what currently works as a good balance is to incorporate learning and housework both throughout the day.

Morning Routine

I let the kids sleep as late as they want to in the morning.  They are usually up and out of bed by 7:30 or 8am, and then we start our morning routine. Our morning routine is an essential part of getting our day going in the right direction. On days when we have skipped our morning routine, we seem somewhat directionless and disoriented, with more-frequent sibling squabbles and making it less likely that we will have a beautiful homeschool day.  

From start-to-finish, our morning routine takes about 60-90 minutes. I have a few different methods for ensuring that everyone stays on-task during our morning routine, but the method I use most often is putting on a music or Spanish CD after breakfast for us to listen to as we go about our routines.

• Read-Aloud and Breakfast - We start with a read-aloud first thing in the morning, either while snuggling on the couch or while the kids are eating breakfast. (Lately, our morning read-aloud has typically been a picture book or Life of Fred). One of my children eats at a rather slow-and-steady pace, so there is usually plenty of time for me to read aloud after I have finished my own breakfast.
• Kitchen Family Work - The kids and I work together to empty the dishwasher each morning.  One child is assigned to empty the silverware basket, and the other puts away all of the children's dishes, which are stored in a low cabinet.  I put away the remainder and empty the dish drainer. 
• Morning Chores - We each have our own chores to do every morning.  The children alternate days on washing and loading the breakfast dishes into the dishwasher. On the alternate days when they are not washing breakfast dishes, the children each do another chore, such as vacuuming the living room, scrubbing a bathroom toilet or sink, or straightening up the craft/project table. The children also feed and water the dog daily. My own morning chores include starting a load of laundry, cleaning up dog poo outside, and filling the birdfeeder.
• Bedroom and Self Care - We each make our beds, brush our teeth, and get dressed for the day.

School Time

2-3 days per week, after our morning routine we have school time. Our school time lasts for 1-2 hours, which may not sound like much time, but we usually accomplish quite a bit in that short time.  Because we use the Leadership Education philosophy, I am focusing on nurturing my children's love of learning and I do not force the kids to participate in school activities.  However, they enjoy this part of our days, and happily choose to participate.

• Alternate Weeks - The children have alternating weeks where they get to choose what we will do during school time.  They love this!
• Physical Activity - Our school time often includes a short walk or bike ride, as we all feel better when we are getting plenty of physical activity.  Sometimes the physical activity will segue into an extended nature study time. 
• Academic Resources - The children can choose from our many curriculum options. The academic resources that my children choose to use most often are:
• Math games
• Life of Fred math book
• Bedtime Math book
• Mystery Science
• Our current read-aloud chapter book

 

Lunch and Free Play/Work Time

After our morning school time 2-3 days per week, we have lunch and then free play/work time.

• Lunch - I usually make a quick lunch for the three of us around 11:30AM.  We eat together and then I clean up the dishes.  
• Free Play for Kids - The kids have 2-3 hours of free play time. They often have long imaginative play sessions during this time. My 9-year-old also often uses some of this time to work on crafts/projects. Knowing that they have this time scheduled for free play each day makes my kids more motivated to dig into school/academic topics in the morning before I go to work in the computer room.
• Work Time for Mom - I work for 2-3 hours on homeopathic appointments/casework, blogging, writing for Real Food and Health Magazine, or homeschool planning.When the weather and my work allow it, we will all go to the park for this time so the kids can play there while I work on my portable computer.

Away-From-Home Days

2 to 3 days per week, we have outside-the-home activities such as homeschoolers park day and book discussion group, field trips, errands, or hiking with grandma. On those days, once our morning routine is finished we head out into the world.  We usually return home in the early afternoon by around 1:30-2:30pm, just in time for our afternoon routine.

Afternoon Routine

Our afternoon routine is an essential part of our days. Without our afternoon routine, I am more likely to be grumpy and burned out in the evening, and the kids are more likely to be bickering and discontented. Because my kids and I each have some amount of introversion in our personalities, the afternoons give us time to recharge on our own. Our afternoon routine usually lasts from about 2:30-4:30pm.
 

• Clean Up - Because the house is often quite messy by the time the kids are done playing for 2-3 hours, we work together to quickly get things back in order.  
• Team Laundry - The kids and I work together to fold and put away a load of laundry. 
• Quiet Time - We each go to a separate room for 1-2 hours.  During this time, the children play quietly, listen to audio books, read, color, or work on projects. They often meet up partway through quiet time, and are free to play together so long as they don't get too rambunctious.  My own Quiet Time includes my daily nap for 10-15 minutes and some combination of yoga, reading, studying, and internet/email usage.

 

Late Afternoon and Evening

Our evening routine includes dinner, free time and our bedtime routine, which ensures that we have fairly consistent bedtimes.

• Clean Up and Chicken Chores -  The kids clean up their Quiet Time messes (minus anything they are still using). My daughter generally does her daily chicken care chores after Quiet Time, too.
• Dinner Prep - I get to work on preparing dinner, and meanwhile the kids either play or join me in the kitchen.  I usually spend 45-90 minutes making dinner.  The kids set the table with napkins, silverware, and drinks for dinner.
• Family Dinner - My husband returns home from work at 5:45pm and we have a family dinner together at 6pm. Afterwards, my husband usually washes the dinner dishes. 
• Evening Free Time - Then there is free time for all, including playing, discussing, reading, creating, going for walks, etc.
• Bedtime Routine - Around 7:45pm, we start our bedtime routine. We do a quick full-house tidying up, which ensures that the following day we will start with a fresh, reasonably tidy house. The children can have a small snack, and then brush their teeth and get their jammies on. I often practice piano or read on my own while the kids are doing their bedtime routines. If the kids finish their bedtime routines before 8:15pm, they may have a few minutes of "quiet energy burst", during which they run and jump around for the last time of the day.
• Nightly Read-Aloud -The kids and I meet up on the couch around 8:30pm.  I give my 6-year-old son the opportunity to do some reading practice, which he chooses to do about twice a week. My 9-year-old daughter often enjoys reading aloud to us from a nature book during this time, too. Then the kids settle in to trace their penpal letters, color, sew, or draw while I read aloud. I often start with a chapter from a history or geography book, and then move onto our current chapter book.
• Bedtime Reading - The kids and I move into their shared bedroom around 9pm. They settle under the covers and I finish reading from our current chapter book. Lights are out around 9:15pm.

Do you like having routines, or are you more of a spontaneous person?What routines that help your days run more smoothly?

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Cultivating a Positive Body Image

This post is the first in a series about positive body image. 

8th grade - I hated looking younger than everyone else

A Pattern of Discontentment

From adolescence onwards, I was never quite satisfied with my body and appearance. In the early years, it was that I was too short and looked too much like a little child. I was a "late bloomer" in that I didn't start menstruating until just before I turned 15 years old. Combine that with being younger than most of the kids in my grade, and the stage was set for having body image issues.

As I moved on into adulthood, I could still always find plenty to be dissatisfied about in my appearance: my freckles, my lack of 6-pack ab muscles no matter how much I worked out or how slim I was, the gap between my front teeth, my different proportions compared to the "ideal". And after becoming a mother, I could easily find ways to be discouraged in my appearance, with my new stretch marks, bigger hips and abdomen than before pregnancy, and an overall different shape than pre-pregnancy.

2008 - early motherhood

Although my negative body image was never severe, and never caused me to do anything drastic, it was like a splinter wedged under my skin, that inexorably kept poking me for over 20 years. Did I really want to let that splinter keep festering for the next 50 or 60 years?

 

Deciding to Change

A couple years ago I had an epiphany: I could just decide to let go of being dissatisfied with my body.  I could decide to be content with being as I am, knowing that I take good care of my body by eating a healthy diet and getting a good amount of physical activity. Rather than continuing to be unhappy with my appearance for the rest of my life, I could just decide to let it go!

This was a big shift for me. I made the decision to stop the internal self-criticism of my appearance, and promised myself that I would be happy to be just as I am. It was a tearful, sweet moment when I looked in the mirror and told myself that I was fine, just as I am. That I am just as I was made to be. That I would love and accept myself, just as I am.

Content to be me in 2016

Settling in to Contentment

Making the decision to change how I viewed myself has been one of the best self-care steps I have ever taken. Although there have been a few times when I have seen myself shifting back into that old negative thought pattern, by reaffirming my decision to accept myself, I have been able to quickly shift back into being content. Making the conscious choice to change this aspect of myself really has worked and allowed me to live the last couple years feeling happier and more whole.

In future posts in this series on body image, I will share how I am actively promoting positive body image in my daughter and the life-changing system that has revolutionized my wardrobe and appearance.

Do you harbor negative thoughts about your own appearance that are keeping you from finding joy?  What has helped you overcome negative body image?

Book Review: The Child Whisperer

In the 9+ years that I've been a mother, I've read many parenting books. Among the parenting books I've read in the last few years, one stands out far above the others: The Child Whisper: The Ultimate Handbook For Raising Happy, Successful, Cooperative Children by Carol Tuttle.  Over the last two years since I read this book, it has really improved my life and my relationships with my children.

What Is Unique About This Parenting Book?

Most parenting books provide one-size-fits-all guidance for raising children.  The Child Whisperer is different. Instead of giving guidance that can be applied to all children, it seeks to give parents an understanding of different types of children.  By focusing more on understanding each of the different types of children, this book lays a strong foundation that can be used for parenting children who are very different from each other. 

One of the things that really surprised me as a parent was how different my son and daughter are.   They move through life differently, they need different things, and they react to corrections differently. Techniques that work for one of them often do not work for the other. The Child Whisperer has finally given me the framework to understanding my children, and how they are different from each other as well as myself. By knowing more about who they are as individuals, I am able to parent them each uniquely, and am better able to meet their needs.

The Different Types of Children (and Adults, Too)

The Child Whisperer describes four energy types that apply to children as well as adults. For children, the four types are summarized as follows:

image from http://thechildwhisperer.com/getting-started/

One thing I love about using Carol Tuttle's four energy type system is that it is much bigger than just a personality profiling system.  When determining a person's energy type, a person's body language and facial features are actually used in addition to personality and tendencies. This method seems to really capture the essence of each person, and that allows for a much greater understanding of each other.

Practical Tips for Each Type

Once the foundation of each energy type is laid out, The Child Whisperer includes tips for parents in supporting their children by gender and at different ages (Baby, Toddler, Pre-schooler, School Age, and High Schooler). The Child Whisperer provides insights into the learning and developmental tendencies of each type, and provides guidance on how to help each type develop their own unique gifts. One of my favorite sections in the book is the list of the Top 10 Things each type needs from their parents.

Understanding My Children

Understanding my children's dominant and secondary energy types has allowed me to finally
understand them at a much deeper level so that I can support them as individuals. Previously, I would often get frustrated at certain aspects of both of their personalities, mostly because they were different from myself and the way I do things. Now I am able to look at them from a perspective of understanding who they are and how they move through life, and that makes such a huge difference in having a happy, well-functioning household.

Here are some examples of how The Child Whisperer has made me a better parent:

• I am a Type 3 with a secondary Type 2 energy. With my dominant Type 3 nature, I tend to move through life with swift determination, and love getting things done. With my secondary Type 2 nature, though, I am emotionally sensitive and love connecting with family and friends.

•  My daughter is a Type 1 with a secondary Type 2 energy. I used to get frustrated with the fact that she would start a gazillion different projects, but finish hardly any of them. I would often tell her that she wasn't allowed to start anything else new until she finished her other projects. Well, it turns out that Type 1's have a gift for ideas. Ideas are the Type 1's gift to the world! I was imposing my own nature (that naturally wants to finish things) onto her; in doing so, I was stifling her own gift for having many new ideas. Now, I allow her to start as many different projects as she'd like, and instead of trying to make her finish them all, I help her learn to determine which projects are important enough to her that she would like to finish them. 

• My son is a Type 2 with a secondary Type 4 energy.  Before learning about the energy types, I would very often tell him to hurry up, and would get frustrated that he seemed to take so long with tasks such as getting dressed, eating, getting buckled into the car, and many others.  After learning about the energy types, I realized that my son naturally has a much slower movement than I do. That doesn't mean that either of us is "wrong"; we're just different. Now I make sure to give him plenty of time for tasks, and I make sure to find other things to do while I am waiting for him so I don't get impatient and keep hurrying him.

• With her fun-loving Type 1 nature, my daughter likes to turn everything into a game. With my own get-it-done mentality, I was often frustrated by this aspect of her personality, and would tell her to stop messing around. Now that I know about the energy types, I try to give her more freedom to find her own fun ways to accomplish things. I definitely still have some room for improvement with this, but I'm trying to support her nature. 

• With his Type 2 nature, my son naturally plans things out in advance. His plans are very important to him, and with his Type 4, more serious secondary nature, he does not take it lightly when his plans are interrupted. Obstructed plans were the main cause of many of my son's emotional upsets, but I didn't quite understand that until I read The Child Whisperer. Now I can respect his plans, and let him take part when those plans need to change (often after giving him some alone time to process that there needs to be a change). This has made a tremendous difference in the number of emotional meltdowns.

These are just a few examples of how The Child Whisperer has helped us. It has been a real game-changer. Our relationships are better and I am now able to help my children overcome the challenges unique to each of their types, instead of trying to mold them to be more like myself.  I can't recommend this book enough!

Have you read The Child Whisperer? What is your favorite parenting book?

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My Family's Winter Diet

I wanted to share a snapshot of what my family's diet looks like these days.  We've been following a Weston Price-inspired diet for over 10 years now, including about 18 months strictly following the GAPS Diet in 2010-2012.  I was very strict with our diets for many years, but over time I have found that approach to be unbalanced, anxious, and stressful. Being very strict with our diets also did not improve our health over the long-term (homeopathy has worked much better for that).

Over the last few years, rather than continuing to exert extreme dietary control, I have shifted to a place of finding balance. My emphasis has been to find a healthy diet that we can sustain and enjoy for many years to come. We are still eating a primarily nutrient-dense diet, but rather than aiming for perfection, I am aiming for an unstressed, maintainable diet.

Because we eat somewhat seasonally, this will be the first in a series, with more dietary snapshots to come in the Spring, Summer, and Fall. Here is a snapshot of our Winter diet.

Breakfast

• Since I wake up early, I often eat two breakfasts. My first breakfast is generally simple, followed by a more substantial breakfast a couple hours later. 
• My first breakfast is often either maple brown sugar granola with plain yogurt or re-warmed homemade muffins with a glass of raw milk. In the winter months, the muffins I make most often are:
• Chocolate, orange, and molasses muffins 
• Blueberry muffins
• Carrot, coconut, and ginger muffins

• My second breakfast is most often sprouted whole wheat or white sourdough toast with eggs and frozen veggie mix sauteed in butter, usually with a glass of raw milk. I have a dose of extra-virgin cod liver oil with my second breakfast about twice a week (as determined by when I feel a craving for it).

• My husband eats homemade custard cake for breakfast 6 days of the week every week. (He likes eating the same thing over and over; I can't stand doing that!) In the winter, I most often make one of the following custard cakes for him to have for breakfast each week:  
• Gingerbread custard cake
• Applesauce custard cake
• Pumpkin pie custard cake
• My nearly-6-year old son often eats sprouted whole wheat or white sourdough toast for breakfast, always buttered, sometimes with honey or jam, sometimes with an egg, and always with a glass of raw milk. On days when he doesn't want toast, he often eats a homemade muffin with a glass of raw milk for breakfast. He chooses to have a dose of extra-virgin cod liver oil with his breakfast about 2-3 times per week.
• My 8&1/2-year-old daughter often has one of the following for breakfast, alongside a glass of raw milk. She also chooses to have a small dose of extra-virgin cod liver oil with her breakfast about once or twice a week.
• Lemon blueberry grain-free muffin
• Homemade Gluten-free waffle, sometimes with a fried egg on top
• Grain-free cinnamon raisin bread
• Apple with cheese or nut butter

Lunch

• My husband takes frozen homemade leftovers to work for lunch everyday, which he re-heats in a toaster oven.  In the winter, his favorite leftover lunches are:

• Ham, bean, and bacon soup
• Beef and beans
• Beef and veggie soup with a side of cheesy bread 
• Bunless cheeseburgers with cheesy bread or chips
• At this time of year, the lunches my children and I eat most often are:
• Grilled cheese or grilled ham and cheese
• Lunchmeat rolls with cheddar cheese, homemade honey mustard, and fermented pickles, with a side of kettle chips
• Leftover soup (from the freezer)
• Mussels or smoked oysters served with buttered crackers or sourdough toast (or waffle for my daughter)

Snacks

• The only snacks my kids are allowed between breakfast and lunch is fruits or veggies, which they have to get for themselves. That makes it where they are certain to be hungry at lunch (whereas previously when they were allowed more-filling snack options, they often didn't eat well at lunch). In the winter, their fruit and veggie snack options are:
• Apples
• Tangerines
• Bubbies fermented dill pickles 
• Carrots
• Dried fruit, such as Just Bananas or Just Fruit Salad
• Dried Just Peas
• Perhaps 40-50% of the time, the kids will have a small snack after our afternoon Quiet Time, usually consisting of nuts, fruit, or cookies (such as butter shortbread). I am always ravenous when I wake from my daily nap, so I always have an afternoon snack such as butter shortbread, plain whole milk yogurt with maple brown sugar granola, apple and cheese, etc.
• The kids have a snack before bed every night; usually fruit, yogurt, or applesauce. About twice per week they will have dessert such as ice cream or cookies. 

 

Drinks 

The drinks we consume the vast majority of the time are:

• raw milk
• homemade kombucha
• fresh-squeezed lemon or lime juice in sparkling spring water
• homemade soda

 

Dinner

• I make a from-scratch dinner meal about 2-3 times per week (and I always make a large portion so there will be enough to freeze for my husband's lunches, or for us to have as leftovers). I can't stand eating the same thing two days in a row, so I plan to eat leftovers a few days later, or freeze them for a future use. In the winter months, the dinners I make most-often are:
• Beef, sweet potato, and veggie stew
• Slow-cooker roasted chicken
• Slow-cooker chili
• Beef and veggie soup 
• Bunless cheeseburgers
• Crustless quiche 
• Side dishes I commonly make in the winter months are:

• Roasted potatoes
• Baked sweet potatoes 
• Cheesy bread
• Frozen hash browns cooked in lots of butter 
• Maple butter Brussels sprouts
• Simple buttered veggies with frozen peas or broccoli 
• Green salad with lettuce, cheese, snap peas, and homemade ranch dressing
• On days when I don't make a from-scratch dinner, we have leftovers or dinners which include some already-prepared ingredients (which I consider to be compromise dinners). The ingredients in our compromise dinners aren't absolutely perfect, but they are pretty good, and incorporating these items into our diets allows for busy days when I don't have hours to spend in the kitchen. Our most commonly-consumed compromise dinners in the Winter are:

• Pizza made with Against the Grain crust, quick-and-easy homemade pizza sauce, mozzarella cheese, sauteed mushrooms, scallions, and nitrate-free pepperoni, kielbasa, or ham
• Nitrate-free sausages such as kielbasa, hot dogs, or mild italian sausage, served with hash browns or frozen sweet potato fries, and fermented pickles
• Spaghetti marinara sauce with added ground beef and veggies (onions, carrots, celery, and/or mushrooms), served over white rice noodles or bean thread noodles
• Tuna salad or chicken salad sandwiches, made with canned tuna or chicken, served with kettle chips and fermented pickles
• We eat out at a restaurant about 2-3 times per month. We also often eat Sunday dinner at my mom's house, and are often blessed with leftovers to often bring home which will make for an easy meal some other day of the week.

Do you find it helpful or interesting to see what we're eating?  What are your favorite Winter meals?

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Snapshots of My Family's Summer Garden

Back in May, we planted a Family Garden. Each member of our family chose a few types of warm-season plants for our garden, and then we got everything laid out and planted. We all work on the garden together most Saturday mornings. Our children have been so excited to watch their plants grow and produce food; they are so proud of what their hard work has reaped and will offer a garden tour to anyone who visits our home. We've had some issues with pests and varmints, but overall our Family Garden is thriving!

Our garden, with the coops and other chicken yards in the background

This year we planted:

• Ian (5 years old): Sugar Pie Pumpkins, Sunflowers, Painted Hill Corn

• Alina (8 years old): Sugar Baby Watermelons, Sugar Baby Corn, Zinnias, Fairy Garden Flower Mix

• Sarah (the mother): 3 types of cherry tomatoes, Max's Yellow Zucchini, Butternut Squash, Okra, Amaranth (all consumed by varmints), 3 types of cucumbers (all consumed by varmints), Pencil Pod Bush Beans

• Ryan (the father): Birdhouse Gourds, Zinnias, Sunflowers

Ian and his corn plants

Ian and his pumpkins, which are taking over everything

The Weed Brigade, cleaning up the area outside the garden fence

Alina and her watermelons

Some of my cherry tomatoes

Alina's flowers and corn

My husband's Birdhouse Gourds

One of Ian's pumpkins

Alina and her corn

  Did you plant a summer garden this year? What is your favorite plant to grow?

How We've Improved Our Marriage This Year

My husband and I have been together for over 15 years, and have been married for nearly 12 years.  We have a strong marriage, but things have definitely changed over time as we became parents of one, and then two children. Daily life with young children is so busy that we can go along without putting any real effort or thought into our marriage, and over time that can take a toll on our relationship.

About 8 months ago, I stumbled across something that has changed my life, my relationships, and my parenting: Energy Profiling. Although I am always open to new information, I wasn't looking for a change when I found Energy Profiling. In hindsight, I can see that finding this information was a true blessing for me and my family.

What is Energy Profiling?

Carol Tuttle's Energy Profiling System is a way of understanding people and the way they move through life.  Carol breaks down the world into 4 Types.  These 4 Types are seen throughout nature and the natural world.

In her book, It's Just My Nature! A Guide to Knowing and Living Your True Nature, Carol wrote,

"The truth is, at your very core, you express a unique, natural energy that influences how you approach new experiences, relate to people, manage challenges, and move through life in general. The truth is, your life runs better in every way when you understand your inner nature and live true to it, rather than fight against it."

The Energy Profiling System is much more than just a personality profiling system. A person's Energy Type encompasses:

• introvert versus extrovert tendencies,
• how a person relates to the world (emotional versus logical),
• body language and physical features,
• the filter through which a person sees the world around them, and
• where a person fits in the whole cycle of doing/accomplishing things, such as having the ideas (Type 1) , planning how to do something and working out the details (Type 2), getting it done (Type 3), and perfecting how it is done while looking at the big picture (Type 4).

What are the 4 Energy Types?

On Carol's Energy Profiling site, she gives the following brief description of each of the 4 Types. To learn more, you can access her FREE Energy Profiling Course here. 

"Type 1: The bright, animated person who has a gift for new ideas and possibilities. The natural movement of Type 1 is upward and light. A person with a dominant Type 1 expression is naturally an upward, light, upbeat person.

Type 2: The soft and calming person who has a gift for gathering details and making plans. The natural movement of Type 2 is fluid and flowing.

Type 3: The swift and dynamic person who has a gift for moving into action quickly to create practical and lasting results. The natural movement of Type 3 is active and reactive.

Type 4: The structured and exact person who has a gift for looking at the world through a critical eye and perfecting it. The natural movement of a Type 4 person is constant and precise."

How Energy Profiling Has Improved Our Marriage

I initially watched the free 6-part Energy Profiling Course on my own. I was excited about what I learned and immediately wanted to share it with my husband. He was a bit doubtful at first, but that changed once we watched the course videos together. We had (and continue to have) some profoundly insightful conversations as a result of learning about our Energy Types. 

Learning about our Energy Types has allowed us to come to a new understanding of each other. We understand better why we each do the things we do, and this understanding has helped our relationship in many ways. Some of the changes have been small, just little details, but others have been more meaningful.

For instance, knowing my husband's Type 4 nature has allowed me to understand and celebrate some of his traits that are often looked at as being "negative" in our society. Being a Type 4, my husband has a natural need for solitude and reflection. Before I understood this, I could easily misunderstand why my husband would often retreat to be alone for some time in the evening. As a Type 4, my husband also has an eye for perfecting things, which could be seen as pessimism, when in reality it is a gift for perfecting.  

My husband has been able to learn more about why I do the things I do, too.  He used to frequently say that I should slow down and relax.  I have a very hard time sitting still or even getting through a whole movie without feeling the need to get up and do something. It turns out that this is part of my dominant Type 3 nature. As a Type 3, I naturally feel the need to accomplish things, lots of things, every day.  When I fight against this aspect of my nature, I find that I feel tired and lethargic.  

Type 3's can also be very impulsive, springing into action very quickly and completing tasks.  On the other hand, my Type 4 husband looks at the big picture and the best way to complete a task.  My natural tendency is to push through and move quickly, whereas my husband naturally wants to work more deliberately and carefully.  Understanding this has made it clear why we can sometimes become so frustrated when trying to work together on a project, and now we are able to talk through these things to make the most of both of our gifts.  

Energy Profiling has allowed us to discuss aspects of ourselves that we may have never even quite understood ourselves. In doing so, our marriage has grown stronger and our family life has improved.

Did having kids change your relationship? Have you improved your marriage this year? What Energy Type are you?

Links to Amazon are affiliate links. If you use these links, your price remains the same, but I earn a small commission. Energy Profiling has been such a fantastic resource for my family that I have signed up as an affiliate for the Energy Profiling System. The initial Energy Profiling Course is free, but if you go on to purchase related products, I will earn a small commission (while your price remains the same). Thanks for supporting this site!